REST.

I feel a beckoning- pulling at me, begging me to come...

Do you feel it too?

I've been searching for this longing since the day I left for Atlanta, GA... honestly. I remember telling my friends that I wish I could feel like I did when I was back at home. This longing, yearning, wanting, can't-live-without feeling for God. I've missed it. And now that's it here again I'm scared it will go away.

I've realized something pivotal in my walk as a Christian. I strive so much to just be enough. I'm continually looking for what's next and how I can do it right. Be enough for my parents approval, be enough to be someones friend, be enough for a guy, be enough to be noticed or praised... This is sounding like pride to me! Some days, my whole day is just routine... I never just l i v e. Maybe resting in who God has created me to be is included in the "life" Jesus said He came to offer those who would follow Him... hm.

I remember one time in MC a man prayed over me because he felt compelled to by the Lord, and it was really odd because he was teaching an inner healing class, and stopped in the middle of the class and called me out of the room. He said, "God wants you to know that He sees you." And then he prayed REST over my entire body.. and afterwards, I felt like a noodle. I thought I had that "Ah ha" moment then but apparantly I didn't. At least I've tasted what it feels like to rest, seen what it looks like to rest, heard about what resting looks like.

I'm ready to live it.
I'm ready to know AND believe that I am right in the sight of God.
I'm ready to let go of my past, let go of my future, and trust His control.
Resting=trusting....
Trusting=life.